You’re trying to book time with a stakeholder. Just a quick sync to align on priorities.
As you scroll through their calendar, you spot it: an executive strategy session.
Your name’s not on the invite.
That gut-punch feeling? It’s all too familiar for product managers trying to build influence without authority. You wonder, Did I miss something? Am I not seen as strategic enough? Should I ask to be included?
I’ve coached dozens of product leaders through this exact spiral. And here’s the truth:
The meeting invite isn’t the prize.
Your seat at the table doesn’t create influence. It reflects it.
What actually shifts your career, and how others perceive your value, is building the kind of influence that pulls you into the room without you having to knock.
Let’s unpack what that looks like.
The Push Trap Product Managers Fall Into
Most product leaders I meet fall into “push mode” without realizing it. You see a decision happening without you and think, I should be in there. So you:
- Ping the organizer with a case for inclusion
- Mention your exclusion in your next 1:1
- Maybe even drop yourself into the calendar invite
It feels proactive. But more often than not, it backfires.
Here’s why: when you push your way in, you enter the room without credibility. You might get a chair, but not a voice. And in a worst-case scenario? You come off as tone-deaf to organizational context.
I worked with a VP of Product at a Series B startup who spent weeks advocating for access to the CEO’s weekly leadership meeting. When she finally got the invite, she realized something brutal: no one knew what to do with her presence. Her commentary felt misaligned. Her insights didn’t land. She’d won her way into the room, but not into the conversation.
That’s the difference between push and pull.
What Pull Looks Like in Practice
Let me tell you about Sarah, a PM I coached at a scaling SaaS company.
Instead of fighting for meeting invites, Sarah started sending short, strategic write-ups after every product launch. These weren’t feature status updates. They were sharp takes on:
- What the release meant for revenue and retention
- What her team learned about customer behavior
- How those insights should shape upcoming bets
She sent them to her manager. Then the VP of Marketing. Then the CEO.
Two months later, Sarah got a message she hadn’t asked for:
Can you join the leadership meeting next week? We want your perspective in the room.
That’s pull-based influence in action.
Why This Matters So Much in Product Leadership
As a PM, you’re expected to influence without authority. You don’t run finance or marketing or sales, but your product touches all of them.
- You rarely own the meeting agenda
- You don’t set executive priorities
- But you’re still expected to drive impact
The lever you do control is consistently making others’ decision-making easier, sharper, and more grounded in context.
When you do that, the invites follow. So do the promotions.
What Strategic Contribution Actually Looks Like
Here’s the trap. Some PMs think contribution equals communication. So they:
- Drop links in Slack
- Chime in on every thread
- Reply-all with urgency
But noise isn’t value.
Strategic contribution means:
- You frame ideas in terms of business outcomes
- You connect dots across teams
- You bring a clear point of view rooted in customer behavior and market context
Here’s a simple way one Head of Product did it.
Every month, she sent a one-page brief with:
- What her team learned about the market
- How it aligned or clashed with company objectives
- What she recommended changing
That email became required reading. The CEO started forwarding it.
The board started referencing it.
She wasn’t chasing access. She was earning relevance.
Four Ways to Build Pull-Based Influence
If you want to stop pushing and start attracting influence, here’s your tactical toolkit.
1. Research and Synthesize — Don’t Just Share
Don’t just drop a link to a Gartner report. Share your take:
- Why does this matter right now
- What could it change about our roadmap
- What are we missing that competitors might already see
AI can pull data. You provide perspective.
2. Tie Everything Back to Business Outcomes
Ask yourself: so what?
- Feature delivered? How will it affect retention?
- UX upgrade? Will it reduce onboarding time or lower support costs?
Use language your CFO would understand. Think revenue, margin, CAC, LTV.
This is how you speak product-as-strategy, not just product-as-roadmap.
3. Be Consistent, Not Just Brilliant
Influence builds through repetition.
Try one of these:
- A monthly strategy brief
- A Friday Signal and Noise insight post
- Post-launch analysis linked to key metrics
It’s not about frequency. It’s about reliability.
4. Shift from Project-Level to Strategic Framing
Instead of “We shipped feature X,” say:
We learned that X behavior is more common than expected. That has implications for pricing, onboarding, and future expansion plays.
This kind of framing builds pull, even when you’re not in the room.
When Not Being in the Room Helps Your Influence
This may surprise you, but not being in the meeting can sometimes work in your favor.
I worked with a Group PM who was left out of early strategy sessions around a company pivot. Instead of pushing to get in, she built a strong doc mapping market trends and customer data to strategic opportunities.
That doc became a foundation for the pivot. Her fingerprints were on the final strategy, even though she wasn’t in the room.
Sometimes, influence is stronger when your ideas move freely without you needing to deliver them.
Getting Started: Shift from Push to Pull Today
Ready to try this out? Start small.
- Audit your current comms. Are you sharing feature updates, or business-relevant thinking?
- Try one strategic share this week. Find a customer insight or market shift and pair it with a clear recommendation.
- Build a rhythm. Weekly, bi-weekly, monthly. Doesn’t matter. Just make it consistent, concise, and strategic.
💡 Tip: Use internal tags like #strategyshare or #marketpulse to give your insights a home in Slack or email.
Ready to Build Influence Without Authority?
This shift from push to pull isn’t always intuitive. But it changes how people experience your leadership.
If you’re feeling stuck in meetings that drain you, or frustrated by the ones you’re not in, I’d love to help you build a strategic comms habit that actually grows your career.
Let’s talk about 1:1 coaching that’s built for product leaders like you, who want sharper impact, not more calendar clutter.
